Crimes Against Fashion

This post is not going to chastise those who unfortunately lack any notion of what fashion is, nor is it going to be a rant about how high-street stores destroy perfectly decent trends (eh em...Topshop!).  This post is in fact aimed at the Local Council and the pain it inflicts on fashion.

Rather fitting for the day of City Council elections, don't you think?

So, what has the Council done?  They have made the pavements too high and the roads too tarmac-ie and hard.

Why is this a crime against fashion?  Because it forces you to wear sensible shoes and if you wear, what I call normal shoes, i.e. heels, you are destined for failure and doom...and possibly pain...

Local Council Bastards...look at that knee...that knee is now a crime against fashion, as are the sensible shoes I am forced to wear as I hobble around in an unfashionable way! 

Although in true Lab Bench Lady style, sensible does not equate to boring...

Lab Bench Lady Customised Trainers

Lab Bench Lady Customised Trainers

I am holding the Council personally responsible for my pain.  And you ruined my So-So Fly freshly done did pedi...ruined my shoes, my legs and my nails...

You've just hit The Lab Bench Lady's Most Wanted List!

How did it happen?  I was walking my bike along the pavement and went to cross the road - tripped, fell down and was crushed my the bike.  Now, I don't blame the bike because she is a Princess and wouldn't have fallen on me if it hadn't been for pavement and tarmac silly-ness. 

So, Council Peeps...you're only going to get my vote if you make pavements lower and roads softer.  It's that simple!